IMPORTANT BUSINESS SCAM - ER, I MEAN: OPPORTUNITY
Copyright
© 2002 James Deacon
Good
Day to you Mister Sir Reiki Person (or Missus Sir Madam Reiki
Person)
First,
I must solicit your strictest confidence in this transaction.
This is by virtue of its nature as being utterly confidential
and "top secret" (and a downright, blatant con).
I am a top official of the Federal Government Department for the
Falsification of Reiki History and am interested in importation
of newly invented, and spurious 'Original Reiki Techniques' and
Artefacts into my country with funds that are presently trapped
in Nigeria.
In order to commence this business, I am wishing to solicit the
assistance of a gullible mark - apologies - my eengleeshe no werry
good - I mean 'an honest and ethical Reiki Master', to enable
me to transfer into their account the said trapped funds (any
assistance that could be offered in regards to finding a good
home for a flying pig would also be greatly appreciated).
The
source of the fund is as follows: During the regime of the last
Military transitional government of General Corporal Sergeant
Your-Honour Abdul-salami-karami-yinyang-ramalama-dingdong Abubakar
(the 3rd), government officials, including my colleague Ackmir
ben Sulibar (also known as 'Honest Al') abu Boohoo, set up companies
and awarded themselves contracts which were grossly over invoiced
in various ministries.
The
present democratic government of Mister His-Holiness President
Olugolu-alubalu-segewege-leggun Obasanjobanjo Smith set up the
Creamitoffthetop Review Panel and we have identified a lot of
inflated contract funds that are presently floating in the Central
Bank of Nigeria ready for payment. However, by virtue of our position
as civil servants and government-sanctioned Scam Artists, we cannot
acquire this money in our names
I have therefore been delegated as a matter of trust by my colleagues
in the panel, to look for some 'mug' - skoozie - I mean an oversea
partner, into whose account we would transfer the sum of US$31,320,000.00
(Thirty-One Million, Three Hundred and Twenty thousand United
States Dollars).
We hope to use this money in purchasing various items, such as:
the original CD format recordings of Mikao Usui-Sensei singing
the Greatist Hits of Perry Como
the straw sandal lost by Mikao Usui in the toe-stubbing incident
on his way back down from receiving Reiki on mount Kurama
the original kimono with authentic calligraphy for word 'Reiki'
hand painted on the back by Usui Sensei (even though the modern
Kanji in which it is written weren't invented til the 1940's)
as well as any number of spurious accounts of the day-today life
working with Usui-Sensei in his Umeboshi-plum
Canning Plant (and
Geisha-House) - as dictated to gullible and overzealous Reiki-Researchers
(-via sharp-witted interpreters with a creative flair and an 'nose'
for a quick buck or a yen) -by demented Old Folk from the Nagatomi
Rest Home for Wayward Karaoke Singers.
Hence, we are sending you this email message. We have agreed to
share the
money thus:
1.
20% for the account owner (you)
2. 70% for us (the officials of the CRP)
3. 10% to be used in settling taxation and all local and foreign
expenses.
Please
acknowledge receipt of this message by sending your acceptance
(along with full details of any Bank Accounts, 'Building Society'
/ 'Savings & Loan' Accounts, CreditCards/ChargeCards/DebitCards
you hold (- including PIN numbers, security passwords, oh - and
the registration documents and [location of the spare keys] for
any vehicles you may own) to fax no.
12344567-001-748586876-85858-590503
or Email:
herecomesanothersucker@1borneveryminute.con
Yours faithfully
Dr. Joseph Olegambo King
NOTE:
PLEASE QUOTE THIS REFERENCE NUMBER (J.O.King/07/02) IN ALL YOUR
CORRESPONDENCE